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Lefty 1 week ago.
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“Big Pats Fan”
So was last night a blueprint game for the Colts?
Rip Taylor will not be down to do a “Hello ‘Frisco” opening for the Monday Night game tonight. Tell your server McButterpants.
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/Dennis
Chiefs fans have surged quickly to the top of my most hated list. It’s fait accompli that Fat Mahomes (seriously, those jowls are on the move) is the best QB of all time and would beat Ditka and Godzilla with one arm. The built in excuses are coming out-if only they had _____, _____, and _____ they wouldn’t have lost every important game to the Pats in blah blah blah fuck them
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As a tribute to my alma mater, Sports Illustrated, which slashed about 50 editorial jobs from an already very lean product last Thursday, you’ll see the familiar column heads such as FACES IN THE CROWD, WHERE ARE THEY NOW, THIS WEEK’S SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE and the return of Rick Reilly, fittingly on the last page of this column
“We probably are going to miss the mortgage payment this month, but the guy who bled SI for millions and was probably one of the fat canaries in the coal mine of SI’s collapse is giving column space to another rich dinosaur who doesn’t need the exposure instead of one of us, as well as..um, old column titles? So yay vintage SI I guess? *sobs*”
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Three classic moments from the long weekend in San Francisco to celebrate granddaughter Hazel King’s first birthday:
• Walking with 2.7-year-old Freddy King
I hope this is a typo, if not FUCK OFF. .7 of 12 is 8.4. My guess is he’s 2 and 8 months, and fatty rounded up 2.66666 so he’s both pretentious and inaccurate
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Paying Pete millions for his self serving column while allowing him to double dip at NBC isn’t a winning business model. Plus financing the fart bus, and Pete turning it in to his personal hey gang who wants to detour 6 hours total for 3 innings of a game? Slap it on SI’s tab and floor it. Any doubt Pete had SI pay for his Boston and Manhattan relocations?
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Three classic moments from the long weekend in San Francisco to celebrate granddaughter Hazel King’s first birthday:
• Walking with 2.7-year-old Freddy King
I hope this is a typo, if not FUCK OFF. .7 of 12 is 8.4. My guess is he’s 2 and 8 months, and fatty rounded up 2.66666 so he’s both pretentious and inaccurate
Cause I have nothing better to do, December 2018:
In San Francisco for Christmas. Sunday, 9 a.m. soccer “practice” for 23-month-old Freddy King, the grandson. My wife and I are on the sidelines, watching, with daughter Laura and Freddy on the field. All of a sudden Freddy gets whiny and starts uttering something that sounds like “pezzl,” but I can’t tell what it is. He is really concerned. Finally, Laura comes over. “He wants a pretzel,” she says. We fish one out. He is happy, and reports back for duty.
I left the rest in because how the hell did he not figure that out?
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So last night, Fatty tweeted
On Thursday, @BrettFavre is 50. Chunk of my column on that Monday.
Totally ludicrous, but totally Fatty. He received *much* pushback (ex: Hes not playing anymore. Surely precious column space could be used on someone CUREENT [sic]), he replied:
There will be 8,900 non-Favre words tomorrow.
Gambling that’ll be enough to overcome the chunk of the column on Favre turning 50. But maybe not.What an arrogant prick
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Maybe I missed it but what was the explanation for the Pats having to call a time-out before the 1st play of the game?
Howe and Reiss said Redskins came out in an OT eligible formation and the Pats didn’t have the personnel to match up.
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i. Arch Manning, the nephew of Peyton and Eli and son of Cooper, is starting at quarterback as a high school freshman in New Orleans. And he’s getting a lot of pub for it. What is he, 15? All in favor of letting a kid be a kid and leaving him alone for a while, raise your hands.
He wrote in his column read by millions…
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that Reilly piece is enraging. Baby Boomer ethos distilled into one smarmy, unfunny paragraph
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Glanced over that Reilly schtick, I suppose every generation rants about how great things used to be but christ these people can’t ever get better at anything. Not that Reilly was ever any good mind you, but Pete and others still talk about how important newspapers are and no, they aren’t. There’s better technology and mediums to get your point across, more efficient ways of doing things. Instead I’ll just shit on everyone trying to do things differently and progress and do better.
I used to subscribe to SI thru the 90s. It was great but I don’t have an interest in it anymore or the last 15 years. I can watch what I want to watch and I don’t care about a backstory.
It reminds me of when used a used to be popular bar closes. The comments are always the same. I used to love this place but I haven’t been there in over 5 years! Hey, maybe that’s why it’s closing and the next generation didn’t like the place. Time moves on.
Reich hates gushy coachspeak. That’s when you tell your team it’s sunny when all 53 players can see it’s cloudy. He didn’t give them the same message a week earlier before Oakland that he gave this week. On Saturday night he told his players: “The rest of the world’s gonna be shocked tomorrow night when they see this game. But we’re not gonna be shocked.”
Yeah, totally not ‘coachspeak’, I’ve never ever heard a coach or player say ‘we shocked the world!’ or a derivative thereof. And ‘we weren’t surprised’ has also never ever been uttered.
The Raiders Are So Interesting
Reminds me of Bugs Bunny giving the monster a manicure – “My stars, monsters are such interesting people!”
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/Dennis
This made me do a spit-take with my coffee, but upon reflection I don’t think Hovartis would ever say there were “too many.” Per Rapaport, the Skins may have made Callahan interim HC, but they’re secretly grooming ex-Patriot draft pick (2008) Kevin O’Connell, their OC, as the potential “long-term” successor to Gruden. When O’Connell is canned after four mediocre-to-awful seasons, will they chalk him up as “another failed Belichick disciple” even though he’s been gone from here for ten years and counting?
Jay Gruden may have deserved a firing but fire him at 5am Monday morning? Just call him into the office following the game and do it then. And Bill Callahan, that ought to turn things around.
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Glanced over that Reilly schtick, I suppose every generation rants about how great things used to be but christ these people can’t ever get better at anything. Not that Reilly was ever any good mind you, but Pete and others still talk about how important newspapers are and no, they aren’t. There’s better technology and mediums to get your point across, more efficient ways of doing things. Instead I’ll just shit on everyone trying to do things differently and progress and do better.
I used to subscribe to SI thru the 90s. It was great but I don’t have an interest in it anymore or the last 15 years. I can watch what I want to watch and I don’t care about a backstory.
It reminds me of when used a used to be popular bar closes. The comments are always the same. I used to love this place but I haven’t been there in over 5 years! Hey, maybe that’s why it’s closing and the next generation didn’t like the place. Time moves on.
Holy shit the rending of garments when Bennys closed in RI. Lot of “I used to come here all the time!” Duh
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If Bruce Allen
and Snyder ever face the media, the only question to ask is how do you explain all of the losing despite several coaches, QBs, etc? What’s been the one constant? Taking this year out, last year was the 20th of Snyder owning the team. 41 games under .500 (I’d have guessed worse) with 5 playoff appearances. In the 20 years prior, in a piece of symmetry Fatty would “entertain” himself with for hours (ONANISM) they were 41 games above .500, with 8 playoff appearances (again, I’d have guessed more) and 3 titals.1 user thanked author for this post.
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